How can anyone carry a baby for 9 months and then “give it away”?
That’s the toughest question to answer; and it’s not a simple answer either. It takes a lot of love and maturity to do something that will ultimately be very difficult. Many expectant parents who make an adoption plan find it rewarding to make a family’s dream of being parents come true. Of course, the most important person in this situation is the child. Selecting a loving and stable adoptive family may provide the best future for a child.
Who selects the adoptive parents?
Expectant parents making an adoption plan are given a selection of profiles prepared by waiting adoptive families to review. These profiles include photos and information on each family’s home, income, marriage, religion, and favorite activities. Once a waiting couple is selected, the expectant parents can meet the future adoptive parents and develop a plan regarding what type of future contact they would like to share. An expectant parent can select, meet, and get to know their child’s future adoptive family!
Does a birth parent ever see their baby?
That depends on the preferences of each individual birthparent. Any expectant parent has the right to see and hold their newborn baby in the hospital if they wish, whether they are making an adoption plan or not. Birth parents can select and meet the adoptive parents who will raise their baby, and have them present at the hospital in a way that suits their comfort level. There are options available for the level of desired contact including closed, semi-open, and open adoption. A closed adoption involves no contact with the child and adoptive family. A semi-open adoption involves contact such as exchanging letters and pictures through the agency or email and perhaps visits in person. Open adoption involves direct contact with the adoptive family through letters, emails, phone, or visits in person. Expectant parents are encouraged to discuss the level of contact they would like to share with their child and the adoptive parents in the future with their counselor. This allows the counselor to assist the birth parents in balancing the level of privacy they desire with the degree of contact they would like to share with the adoptive family.
How soon will the baby go home with his/her adoptive parents?
In most situations, the baby goes home from the hospital with the adoptive parents. There are some areas in which court regulations or state laws require the family to wait until after a court hearing before they can take the baby home. In these situations, the baby will be placed in an approved pre-adoptive home until they can legally go home with their adoptive parents. If an expectant parent feels they need more time to make an adoption plan, the baby can also be placed in a preadoptive home for a period of time to allow her to be certain of her decision.
What about the birthfather? Does he have rights?
Yes he does, and our birthparent counselors will be happy to talk with him, too. An expectant couple can work together on their adoption plan, or can meet separately with the counselor if they prefer. If an expectant couple aren’t sure if they agree on an adoption plan, they are encouraged to communicate with their counselor and ask questions about their options.